more woes & general discouragement

I talked to a friend about the ignominy of working the read-marketing sites. I think every author considers it a humiliation of sorts to have to read a book just to get someone to read ours. But I was at the end of my rope - how else could I get anyone to read them, without spending money?

That's an exaggeration, of course - or not entirely accurate. I can spend money, just don't want to, as a matter of principle, as I shouldn't have to spend money to make money. Or, I shouldn't have to risk losing money on the entire affair, which I think plenty of people have done. I lurk around the sites enough to know that the vast majority of new authors make a splash on their first printing, printing maybe a hundred or thousand and selling many to friends and colleagues, and in the end are like me, wondering why the world isn't beating a path to their door. I never did this, but have the same problem: the world doesn't know about me; I don't want to use the traditional publishing channels, and therefore my books sit there on the Amazon virtual shelf wondering where all the readers are.

I care a lot about the short stories, and for that reason have been fretting a lot about the short story audience. Where are they? How do I reach them? I know that lots of authors like my stories and think I should be out there doing well. I'm not. I'm out here wondering why nobody buys short stories. But I know it's just a matter of reaching the ones who do read them, and do spend money.

My author friend said, if you "look indie," they reject you. I'd like to know if there isn't more to that than meets the eye. There is a formula people use for blurbs, and I don't want to use a formula: does that "look indie?" Or, maybe there are fonts that are more common in the book publishing world than the ones I've chosen. Do mine "look indie?" I'm beginning to consider putting "proofread three times" or "no editing errors" on my books just in case I "look indie." But I also realize that I want to look indie. I am indie. Pretending otherwise would be misleading.

At the dawn of the new year I'm doing a little review of the year's activities. It's true, I've become entirely dependent on read marketing for the ratings that I have; what readers I have, are mostly other authors and possibly their friends. I have yet to get my paperback copies out into the world successfully. I hear a few good things every once in a while - that friend was nice to me, for example - and feel that I may have a slowly developing reputation, which of course I need. But I also go long periods - in this case about a month - where I am trapped into not writing because I have failed to plan out my novel well enough - and in the course of intensive read marketing, which I do instead, end up feeling like I've hit my head against a brick wall a few too many times.

Such is the business, and I can only hope it gets better.